She says, “I have to get rid of toxic people in my life.”

I listen.

She continues, “People who aren’t in integrity with themselves, you know the liars and manipulators. The ones who steal your heart.”

She takes a defeated breath. “I gave him my heart, and I don’t know how to find it, or if I’ll ever have it again.”

I scoot closer to her and tenderly, quietly say, “You still have your heart.”

I smile and keep eye contact.

She squirms and quickly changes the subject.

But, within minutes, her painful emotions dominate, and she’s pulled back into her painful story.

I get so depressed.” Big sigh, “I thought he wanted to be with me.”

Friend, I understand that the above conversation may sound like a woman being taken advantage of, however, she knowingly reentered a relationship with him aware of his beliefs and isssues with women.

My question is WHY? Why would she or anyone put themselves in a situation that is sure to hurt them?

I believe that, as simplistic as it sounds, the core of the issue is self- love.

If she, or anyone for that matter, held intrinsic regard and love for self – harmful relationships would not be an issue.

If you’re in a relationship that you know is hurtful, regardless if it’s in a romantic, business, or friendship relationship – please do whatever is necessary to build your self love.

Yes, you’re self-love can grow if you’ll give your attention to growing it.

The list of ways to grow your self-love is endless:

  • Find a counselor that you feel safe with
  • Self-help workbooks (they’re countless) a couple examples – The Artist Way or Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life
  • Kelly Howel’s CD Visualizations
  • Forgiveness work – 7 x 70 I (your name) forgive _________for. Say this outloud for 7 consequtive days 70 times per day (It’s good to start with yourself) or the Hono Pono prayer – I love you, I’m so sorry, please forgive me, thank you.
  • Work with a mentor/intuitive guide
  • Join a group that focuses on healing
  • Allow your creative side to flourish – what do you love to do?
  • Listen – deepfully, soulfully, respectfully to what your gut is telling you and abide to what you know is true for you

A Plain Truth message on the subject:

Life’s tool box is called Love: Ever feel like you don’t have the correct tools to live an extraordinary life? Believe it or not… the only tool you really need to soar the heights… is Love. You may possess many talents, be smart as a whip, be a model of beauty, but if you don’t possess Love within, you will search far and wide for the perfect life-soaring-tool yet fail to find it. Dig deep if you must… and pull out your toolbox of love, and live your extraordinary life.

To your extraordinary life..

With all my love,


P.S. Friend, if you haven’t yet signed up for my new FREE PDF Live from the Deceased gift, here’s the link: